I've been watching horror movies, some good, many 'meh' and some so bad they're funny and therefore good.. And even I find myself yelling at the TV in frustration. I'm sure that if I did a Google search I'd get a ton of hits for 'how to survive a horror movie' not even counting the rules spelled out in the first 'Scary Movie', but maybe writing my thoughts will save my television abuse.
Lift your feet up when you're running through a forest
If someone wants to show you something, get them to bring it to you, don't follow them to some weird secluded location.
If you are with your partner just have normal sex in a bed, don't sneak off into the forest or try a secluded cabin.
If something/someone seems a bit off trust your instinct.
If a girl seems a little crazy, no matter how hot she is, do not take her to your hotel room.
If you see a scary as f@#k spider mannequin monster with multiple heads, ditch the girl you just found and get the hell out of there.
If you hear a sound don't investigate it just run the other way.
If you have a gun on someone who you don't trust.. shoot them in the leg just in case, before they start talking and edging towards you.
Never build on ancient Indian burial grounds.
Never split up.
Never enter a room filled with what seem like faceless nurse statues armed with surgical instruments. No matter how sexy in a sick way they are.
If you are left on an island and told to fight your classmates to the death they will never be your friends.. don't even try.. in fact start collecting weapons.
